Newsletter No. 26 - October 29, 2026
When did you last let yourself really enjoy something? Not squeeze it in between tasks or scroll past it, but let it land. If a flicker of guilt showed up before the answer did, you’re in good company.
Last week I wrote about building the capacity to feel through the hard stuff. That matters. This week is about the other direction: leaning into what feels good.
The colors are changing. Living in a beautiful place is an advantage when I’m feeling stuck. Simply walking outside gives me the opportunity to feel awe and beauty. Where is your blue today?
In Somatic Experiencing®, we use the terms blue and red, coined by Steve Hoskinson of Organic Intelligence. Blue is pleasure, what we prefer. Red is pain, what we don’t like.
That guilt makes sense, especially when so many people in the world can’t indulge. We’ve trained ourselves, and our nervous systems, to scan for what’s not working, to stay alert and stay safe. That’s fair. But we rarely practice pendulating the other way, letting ourselves rest in what feels good.
I’m a perfect example. Around age 14, I developed symptoms that confused every doctor I saw. No one knew what was “wrong” with me, so I became very aware of anything that didn’t seem “right.” Eventually that hypervigilance became the state I lived in: worried, stressed, ashamed. Martial arts, bodywork, and loving practitioners led me to find more acceptance for my body and believe I was strong, capable, and imperfectly perfect. But patterns run deep, and I still need train myself to seek out the blue.
The more time I spend in blue, the more capacity I have for red. By capacity, I don’t mean holding more. I mean feeling through things without being derailed. Stuck in red, we can’t see the whole picture. With practice, you can be in the soup and not drown.
This matters in relationship, too. Can I be okay when the other person isn’t? Can they help me see what’s working when I can’t? Can I let myself feel good when the people around me don’t?
It matters this season as well. Elections are coming, and emotions run high. I won’t talk politics, but I will name the danger of the downward red spiral. Does feeling bad about something make it better, or does it just drop us into depression and freeze? What mobilizes us is remembering what we love, what we care for, what is actually working. If you can be that reflection for someone else, all the better.
It would be a sad world if Derby and Uma only focused on what wasn’t going well for them. They remind me daily that staying in the moment and finding the joy, even in the mundane, makes a real difference.
This week: find one blue thing, like warm tea, sun on your face, or a favorite song. Notice where you feel the “like” in your body, and stay a few breaths longer than feels natural. Take note of when you are back in the red and return to the blue. A few minutes of being present with this over time will make a big difference.
Work with me
I’m currently accepting 1:1 clients who want to lean more into the blue and practice the art of pendulation. Together we’ll build your capacity to move through whatever shows up in life, and, most of all, to enjoy and celebrate the things that are going well and feel good.
How many times has something happened that deserved a celebration, only to get pushed aside by the next thing to worry about? Sound familiar?
Sessions are available online or in person in Abruzzo. If this piques your interest and you feel it could make a difference in your life, I would love to support you on this path.
Sending love from my small corner of Italy!
Moody skies in Decontra this afternoon.
